By Paul Andrew Bourne, M.Sc. (pending); B.Sc. (Hons), Dip. Edu.
The ‘sugar daddy’ phenomenon has been a controversial area of focus in the Jamaican social culture. It has been purported by many lay researchers that the women are the only beneficiaries from these relationships (that is, practice). The phenomenon is becoming a norm within the Jamaican society. But the initial practice began with younger innercity females being lured into sexual escapades by middle/upper class older men. Today, the practice has taken on other intriguing dimensions. Are the males within the relationships only luring the females, and the women only merely innocent beneficiaries?
The Literature Review from an article entitled "Searching for Regeneration" unveils that, men were involved in the ‘sugar daddy’ relationship because of its satisfaction – "regeneration". In that, the men needed the lifeblood of young women to ward age and pretend they are young again. This is a state where the man engages in a relationship with his junior in order to encapsulate the past – youthful years of yesterday. The process is carried out through the social settings, such as "passa-passa" – a popular Wednesday night road party in the dance hall arena in which the ‘sugar daddy’ is accompanied by a young woman who is dressed to "kill". She bears the finest personal attributes, for example, lean well shaved legs, stiff half covered breast with the latest designer garment. The expensive jewellery and the fancy hairstyles are additional accessories that are paraded to catch onlookers. An important feature of this process is the passport given to the ‘sugar daddy’ by the young mistress to enter those social settings. It is this new experience that fosters the thrill for the ‘sugar daddy’. Because a man’s ego needs that kind of pampering, there is without any doubt a cause why the man enters and enjoys the experience.
Furthermore based on Bruce Kirkland’s commentary on the dance hall film entitled ‘Dance hall Queen’, he posits that the Jamaican woman use her physical attributes and apparel to manipulate an affluent old male in order to change per financially challenge lifestyle. The findings of this research supported this postulation as the women revealed that use those relationships for monetary gains. The ‘sugar daddies’ would pay the rent, pay their school fees, use to acquire clothing and other personal accessories including expensive cars, cellular phones and jewellery.
However, a startling revelation was that the ‘sugar daddy’ phenomenon is no longer limited to the dance hall (innercity females) but is now embraced by all social classes. The finding supported this fact. The researchers interviewed an upper class young female from Forest Hills, Kingston, Jamaica who stated that in order to main her ‘flashy’ lifestyle, she had to have a ‘sugar daddy’. He bought the Benz, paid for the frequent flights to Europe and showered her with custom made jewellery. Jewellery priced in excess of $250,000 for one with her name on.
Nevertheless, the relationships from the Literature Review revealed that in Jamaica the idea of condom use was favourable and prevalent. The Semi-Structure Interviews revealed that women did not fear contracting sexual transmitted infections because they all used a condom in their sexual encounters with the ‘sugar daddies’. However, in Africa (a region where AIDS/HIV is the leading cause of death) that although the idea of condom use was prevalent to an extent it was not necessarily deemed favourable as the woman knows that should she refuse to obey the man’s demand of not using a condom she would lose all the ‘trappings’ and luxury would cease. The irony from the Literature Review was the ‘fear of STIs’ was assessed as the lowest of all as they assumed the man was faithful to them and his wife, whereas the biggest threat was the wives of these men were their wives finding out about their infidelity.
It was revealed from the Literature that saying no to the lucrative bribes of the ‘sugar daddies’ is rather difficult, as often times these older men will shower young school girls with expensive gifts that they would not be able to enjoy if they were to wait on their parents. The findings revealed that in Jamaica some innercity parents go as far as to encourage their young impressionable daughters to engage in the practice. Why? Due to the fact that the ‘sugar daddy’ wants a younger female and this is a fact known by many inner city parents, oftentimes mothers use their daughters as economic weapons to tackle the family’s economic difficulties. It would appear that the young females are in full agreement with this practice, however, often times these females engage in these activities beyond personal wishes so as to merely comply with their parents’ demands. By so doing these ladies compromise societal norms and morals, and so they are conceived sometimes whores by many society members. The previously mentioned scenario is highlighted and supported by the popular Jamaican film "Dance hall Queen" where Marcia encouraged her daughter to accommodate the ‘sugar daddy’s’ wishes so as to receive the financial rewards.
As noted in the findings and supported by the Literature Review, the establishment of sugar daddy relationships is initially centered on the exchange of money for intimacy. These relationships involve a tremendous outlay of money on the part of the sugar daddy. As with any investment, one expects returns. It can then be concluded that it is this anticipation of returns that leads to the belief that sugar daddies seek to control their partners to ensure the returns on their investment, i.e. sexual favours and intimacy.
Yet, the controlling nature of some sugar daddies may be explained by other factors that led him to establish the relationship in the first place. For instance, the earlier identified factor of low self-esteem may also become a mediating factor in the relationship. The relationship will offer, to a degree, some form of reinforcement that will heighten his self-esteem. Thus the sugar daddy will take drastic steps protect his self-esteem. Keeping a close watch on his partner, and controlling her movements are simply manifestations of his desire to protect himself. Thus the example cited of the sugar daddy placing possessions in the woman’s name, making it difficult for the woman to leave, represent such drastic steps. Thee actions point to the additional factor of insecurity, where he can not trust the actions of his partner, and feels that she may leave him.
These controlling behavious on the part of the man are at times consolidated by the needs of the woman. Once again, poor economic conditions of the female, before the relationship, may force her to endure the controlling actions of the man, as he may be the only source of income that she needs to survive.
The use of pregnancy to "trap" the man represents the turning of the tables. Thus, they themselves are instituting their form of control over the man. However, this behaviour is not confined to women facing poorer, or unstable economic situations, which have their survival in mind. Factors of profile maintenance, and "bragging rights", that led these women to these relationships, may result in these women seeking their own returns from the relationship.
On the other hand, the wives in these situations apparently may have mixed feelings about these extramarital relationships that their spouses are involved in. At times the wives may feel insecure, as they feel that there is a possibility that their husband may leave them for the younger woman at any time. Although, on the other hand, the wives may accept these relationships as they believe have the "ring on their finger". They may see these relationships as advantageous in deceasing stress as the young woman may take some of her "wifely" responsibilities, for example sexual activity, therefore lessening how much she has to actually contribute. They are secure in their marriage and believe that their husbands’ won’t leave them.
There is apparently abuse, on the part of the males, in the form of psychological abuse. The males have some sort of "psychological hold" on the young women, where they treat them as property and they begin to play the role as such. She is under his control, where she is basically not free and he has to be aware of every move she makes.
Based on the Literature and the Findings, many females enter into these relationships because of the security feature. Security speaks to: one, the father figure of the sugar daddy; two, guidance from the sugar daddy because of his years of experience; and three, financial stability. Many young school girls and other young girls because of the fact that they lack a father figure over the years usually enter into those relationships solely to embrace the need for a father figure. This is a sense of stability and security for countless young females in Jamaica, and other areas in the world. Further, some females see a sugar daddy as having accumulated wealth and this provides a sense of security that few young males would have had. As such, they (sugar daddy) provide psychological and financial support.
The issue of oral sex is topical and widely not practiced by younger males or so it is widely believed by many people within our society. As such, because many young females enjoy this sexual practice, they often times shy away from their male counterparts as they believe the reluctance and coaxing are not worth the while given the fact that older men are usually willing to engage in such a practice without hesitation. This is also another feature that supports the ‘sugar daddy’ phenomenon. Both the Literature Review and the findings have agreed with this area of the practice and why young females go for ‘sugar daddies’.
On another aspect of this discussion, low self esteem is cited as factor for this practice in Jamaica. It is revealed by the Literature and supported by the findings that older men hide their low self-esteem behind money. In that, men with sexual dysfunctions are highly likely to enter in these relationships as they do not demand intimacy and-or penetration. Because the male knows that the female wants the financial support for survival, he would have her to boast his ego among his friends. This experience is highlighting to his colleagues and associates within the social setting that he is still able to charm a young damsel. This within itself explains a psychologic problem faced by this older man. According to Maslow, the definition for that state is known as self esteem.
From the Literature Review, there is a correlation between finances and the continuance of the ‘sugar daddy’ phenomenon. In that, the ‘sugar daddies’ use their accumulated wealth and social position to lure their preys into their web of deceit because they know the financial difficulties experience by these women. These older males shower their victims with expensive gifts and often times supply them with basic necessities and other luxurious items. Because intimacy is not a prerequisite of those relationships, the ‘sugar daddies’ would deceive as many young girls as possible, and afterwards move to another individual. In that, the women want the money, and men want the sex. Hence, there is that correlation between the practice and finances.
In conclusion, there is a positive correlation between the ‘sugar daddy’ phenomenon and some of the socio-cultural factors. A correlation exists between finances and the continuance of the phenomenon. In that, the more unemployed young females that there are, it is the more we will see an increase in the ‘sugar daddy’ practice. In that, the women want the money for survival and the men want the sex to which they are willing to pay for. Further, there is no qualitative method available to us whereby we are able to measure the strength of that relationship. Nevertheless, the finding concurred with the Literature Review that a positive correlation exists between the practice and finances. Although a relationship exists between; self esteem and the practice, oral sex and the practice, security and the practice, social ideal and the practice, status and the practice and resources and practice, we cannot say that a correlation exists for those issues just mentioned. What is true, however, there is direct relation between the phenomenon and the socio-cultural factors. Above all else, all the above findings were consistent with the Literature, and the claims were equally consistent with the researchers’ hypothesis and so adds potency to past studies on the subject matter.
(excerpt - research findings)